De-glutening, playdough, and dancing

Four days until I go gluten free. The rest of the fam will be doing gluten free dinners, but until we know if this is actually going to help me, I won't force it on them (...yet) I am glad to announce that Neato Burrito is gluten free (except for the tortillas) and when I asked the manager about it he was quick to respond that they are trying hard to be entirely gluten free, but are unable due to their tortillas. *nod* understandable. You can't make a burrito without a tortilla! I just get a bowl of burrito instead (saves me the massive calories) and so I don't have to change a single thing to be able to eat there (except for them changing gloves for me)! Totally. awesome.

I feel that this will be a good move for me, health-wise as well. This will force me to watch everything I eat and be more responsible for my own actions. If I don't follow my rules, I'll get sick or completely defeat the purpose of my quest. Intimidating? I think so. I'm thankful that I don't have to worry about our entire family (or at least, yet).

I let Arianna play with playdough the other day. I put her in her highchair (she only ever eats there) and she assumed it was food. Joy. I tried to show her how to poke at it and mold it. She did that for about 2 minutes before she tried to nom on it again. Guess we're not ready for playdough yet, but that's okay. We're going to try salt dough ornaments soon and all she has to do is shove her handprint on it :) I needed to find a cheap alternative for Christmas presents this year. We're just not "rolling in dough" (oh boy...haha funny pun) and so we need to get creative. My friend, Sarah, will be teaching me how to use my sewing machine this month and I'm hoping that will help us save money also.


I decided it would be a good idea to go to Walmart on black Friday (actually, Thursday). I wanted to grab the Kinect Sports and Dance Central 2 that were only 15 bucks. So, I leave my cozy house to go to Walmart, assuming that I'll grab the games and walk around until the sale at 10pm. Boy, was I wrong. I stood beside this stupid palate of games for more than an hour (thankfully I was one of the front people) and struck up some nice chat with the others around me. We decided that I'd dive for the Dance game, the other dude would dive for Sports, and the chick behind me would dive for Batman. Sweet. We had a plan. So they open the palate and everyone dives. There are 8 of each game (seriously!?) and we dive...some huge dude lands of top of me, which was totally terrifying. I kick my way out and run to meet my "pals" and we trade off. Thankfully, I was able to get two Dance games (one for my buddy in Louisiana) and ship it to her. She got it today and we'll be dancing tonight! WOOT! So, thankfully I got the games, didn't die, and was successfully unscathed! Win! I might say that the dance game is pretty sweet. I dig it.

I found myself trying to really "calm" down lately. I get so upset so easily. Whether it be over people who refuse to grow up, over petty disagreements with a choir member, or my kid screaming because she doesn't want to miss a thing during nap time. I'm trying desperately to learn to not care about others lives and realize that people do some dumb things that no matter how much I try to sway them from making mistakes, they're not going to listen to me anyhow.

I've recently been struggling with a family member who has never ever put any effort forth in our relationship ("our" meaning our family, not just myself). They'll only call when they need something, only bother talking to us when they have an ability to "use" us. Add to the fact that there is always an excuse for this behavior, always some sort of "logical reason" as to why they act this way. Irritating. You can only rationalize using people, ignoring them, and not being financially stable for so long. How much debt do you have to accrue before you realize how much you're hurting yourself? I will never understand people that always have to have a man in their life. That constantly compete against you for happiness. I'm happy, my husband is awesome, my daughter is beautiful and smart, I can't ask for more. Why do people come into your life just to stress you out and tell you that they're better than you? You're not better than me. End of story. Mommy and Daddy can only make excuses for you for so long. You're getting married. Grow up. *sigh* So here I sit, rationalizing with myself about this relationship. Why is it that family is allowed to treat you like crap and assumes they can get away with it because their label is "family"? I've put a ton of effort into our relationship and haven't received a darn thing (not even a freakin' phone call) in almost 5 years. I believe it is time to cut the strings. Bye bye, user. I will not miss you. I'm not going to be strung along because of the title "family" and you're not going to string along my husband and daughter either. Don't tell me you love my kid when you don't do a darn thing to see her. Ever. Skype exists. Use it. Otherwise, let's just accept that you don't care. The "I'm so busy" excuse only lasts so long. I worked full time, went to school full time, and was still able to call home and see my sister. Don't give me your b.s. line. I don't want to hear it.

See, this turned into a rant. *oops* Here's my point: I'm done with drama. I'm the type of person that doesn't put up with anyone's crap and I can't do anything "half way". It's all or nothin' baby. You've given me nothing, I'll give you nothing. Seems fair right? I mean, heck, you wouldn't tell your secrets to someone you met on the street, right? So why would you tell a family member you barely know (because you refuse to try) about your secrets? Makes no sense to me! So I'm clearing out the bad in my life. I'm clearing it out so that I can be healthy in my relationship with my wonderful husband, beautiful daughter, and trustworthy friends that have stuck by my for years. I'm clearing space for those that matter, that care, and that would go the extra mile for me, like I would for them. So here we stand. It's "fall/winter" cleaning time. Physically, mentally, socially, relationship-wise. I'm thankful for the wonderful people I have in my life. Why muck it up?

I guess it's a little late for a thankful post, but here's Reader's Digest version of what I'm thankful for:

My husband
My daughter
My parents
My grandparents
My in-laws
Baxter
Donna (and hoodlums ;)
Sarah, Dan, Ronan
Erin and Brian
Mary, Chris, CJ, and Joe
My choir members
My children's choir members
My handbell ensemble
My wonderful K4 and K5 classes
My cozy home
Heat
Electricity
Transportation
Sleep
Food
Financial responsibility
Debt free life
AMANDA :)


I'm sure I've missed things, but you get the general gist. I am THANKFUL for what we have. I praise God for the life I've been given. He is in control and I am not. If I can remember that, I will live a full, rich, happy life. The control freak must.give.up.power.